Thanksgiving was last week, and I was lucky enough to get to celebrate it with my class mates and our host families, and the girls who are studying at Aix welcomed us to their center. One girl sang some French songs and she had such a great voice! She changed the lyrics for the song "La vie en rose" to fit Thanksgiving: "La vie en dinde" (Life in pink... Life in turkey). It was really cute.
But while the meal was delicious and it had a familial atmosphere, it just wasn't the same. The whole week I kept forgetting it was Thanksgiving and that at home all my friends were already on break. I did get to Skype my family at home when everyone was gathered at my cousin's house for dinner and that was so nice. Otherwise, I hadn't given Thanksgiving and what I'm thankful for much thought.... until now. So now, as I procrastinate on my homework, I've decided to put my distracted mind to better use. Now for some reflection on all that I've been feeling grateful for lately.... (Better late than never right?)
The semester is coming to an end soon. I am lucky enough to be staying, but it's going to be so hard saying goodbye to my classmates. We have become a little family, and while I may not be close with each of them, they all mean something important to me in one way or another.
I look back on this summer before I left for France, or even before, at the beginning of my sophomore year, or even way before, during my senior year in high school, when I first knew I'd be coming here for a year, and all that I had anticipated. I can't tell you how many hours I'd spend imagining what it'd be like to truly live in France. My biggest goal so far. How much it means to me. My dream. And here I am... smack dab in the middle of it. It's a long and ongoing dream with tons of adventures and surprises, and it's the best dream I've ever had. I don't ever want it to end. But I know that it will have to eventually. The only comfort in this is that, just as when one door closes and another opens, I can create a new dream and big goal to work towards (like coming back to France :D).
While I am living in the present, I do think about the future a lot... on one hand I don't ever want to leave Marseille/France, but seeing as I have to, knowing I have my best friends at Linfield and Phi Sig and my family to go back to, that eases my mind. It's not going to be an easy transition. I do fear it will be too painful to handle at times, but I can get through any hardship especially with these people at my side. That, and in general it will be so, so, so, so amazing to see them again at the same time in the context of home. Sometimes I imagine what senior year will be like, just like I did with imagining what living in Marseille would be like. It helps to have something to look forward to, to keep things optimistic.
My American friend Suzie, who is in the same program as me, is leaving at the end of the semester but coming back at the beginning of the next semester to teach in Marseille and we will even be taking some of the same classes together. I have found a true friend in her, and I couldn't be happier to have one of my closest friends here to actually be coming back rather than leaving after just one semester like most students do... Alhamdullilah! For that, I am so looking forward to next semester.
In approximately.... 25 hours, I will be leaving for Oslo, Norway to see one of my dearest friends from Linfield, Erin. I am going to cry I think when I see her. Not only because it will feel so wonderful to spend some time together after all this time (let alone in EUROPE!) but it will remind me (both of us really) of when our friend group at school is all together, and how great that is. I think it will make us really nostalgic, but at the same time ecstatic to create some memories together... halfway around the world! I am excited to meet and hang out with her friends there and see her life in Oslo!
In 21 days, my family will be coming to see me in France for Christmas. Enough said.
I have made some great friends here in Marseille, both American and French, and met some really awesome people. I hope to meet more people and become closer with the ones I already know. My French gets even better every day and I find myself not only thinking in French, but like the French. Of course I cannot change the fact that I am American, I can't change the way I see or think about certain things because I was raised in the American culture. But you can add different facets to yourself and adopt new cultures, too. I learn more about the French culture every day and I love it and am adopting it, observing and imitating and living it. The goals I had for myself before coming here are becoming a reality and that, my friends, is a sweet, sweet feeling. There is truly no better feeling than success (hmmm maybe that's a culturally subjective statement... :)
I am grateful for all the opportunities that have come my way and will continue to.
I am grateful for the connections I've made here and will continue to develop.
I am grateful for the friends and family from home that have written me and taken the time out of their day to talk with me or Skype me to keep in touch. That means.... so much.
I am grateful for my family and friends in general. I've got some damn good ones :)
I am grateful for my host mom, who is basically an older version of me. Or rather, I am a younger version of her. To some extent anyway. We just get each other.
I am grateful for the ability to travel, to those who have opened their homes to me and shared with me their cultures. My list of places I've been to keeps growing and it's fantastic.
I am grateful for the coffee machine at school that provides us 50 cent cappuccinos every day.
I am grateful for Bastogne cookies to eat with my 50 cent cappuccinos.
I am grateful for French cuisine.
I am grateful for RyanAir and the train.
I am grateful for public transportation- the metro, especially.
I am grateful for Pastis and Rose wine. My besties on Friday and Saturday nights... hahaha.
I am grateful for crazy good memories and unpredictable nights.
I am grateful for the Vieux Port and le parc St. Victoire and Barbarousse, which are my favorite places in Marseille... bahahaha.
I am grateful that Mcdo is right across the street from Barbarousse for snack time and refueling... :) And that they have a 2 euro snack wrap... !
I am grateful for meaningful conversations.
I am grateful for my country- don't get too excited, that doesn't mean I like the US more than France now :) It just means I have learned more about and how to understand my own culture by being here and I accept the fact that I can't remove myself from my American culture (even if I really want to at times!). The point of study abroad (or one of the many points...) is not to learn to like one culture more than the other (although that's possible), but to learn to be neutral, to see things from both sides and have empathy for both cultures in their own contexts. All this has helped me learn about myself.
On a patriotic note...
I AM GRATEFUL FOR OBAMA.
I am grateful for the opportunity to put myself outside of my comfort zone in order to understand and learn more about myself and others and the world.
I am grateful to be here.
I think that about sums it up for now. And in any case, I think you all get the idea.
I love my class!
Les filles :)
Manue!
Sara!
Suzie!
My class in Aix for Thanksgiving
Sara, Clare, Suzie et moi
Our wonderful professor/advisor/mentor/American ally.... :)
